You have a new tattoo and an old one covered up with a funny looking bird that you drew on yourself I wanted to let you ink my skin thinking love would never really fade I get that itch again but I do not want traces of any man on my body the invisible ones still linger as real and as visible to me as anything will ever be I wish I could forget and be in bliss ignorantly I can cope with most emotions but the disgust I feel when I think of the things you did to my body make me lose my appetite all over again like I'm nineteen and throwing up in your bathroom shrinking every time you scream at me and I sit there in misery too deep in it to leave
This poem is about a recent meet up with an ex and reminiscing on what we had, as well as still living with the trauma of my prior relationship, which I was deep in when I met him. It feels like it’s been a while since I wrote about these topics! I hope it’s not tiring but I will always return to them unintentionally - when I write, everything I’ve ever felt resurfaces.